A lot of boys don’t like school. And a lot of boys don’t do well in school. Yet virtually every single boy who’s flunking out of school, not doing his homework, just getting by or wailing “I hate school!” was once a curious little toddler. What gives?
That’s a question I’ve pondered many, many times in my personal and professional life. That question, in fact, is part of why I founded this site: I want to help parents, educators and concerned citizens build healthy boys and men, and I strongly believe that holding onto and harnessing boys’ curiosity and creativity is an essential part of that.
Want some more direct answers to the “why boys don’t do well in school” question? Check out these articles. Some are written for parents and some are written for teachers, but I think you’ll find some helpful nuggets in all of them. (And if anything particularly resonates with you, please come back here and let me know. I’d love to hear what’s helpful to you, and how you plan to help the boys in your life.)
Why Boys Fail — And What You Can Do About It
4 Responses
I was miserable in school from kindergarten thru 12th grade because I was ridiculed and taunted constantly day in and day out because I am gay. I did everything I could to imitate the way other boys held their books, sat, walked, talked, etc., but they never quit taunting me. School was hell for me every day and there was not a soul on earth I could go to for help. Countless boys still have this exact same experience today.
I’m sorry you had such a miserable experience, Dave. You’re right: lack of acceptance and bullying is another reason many boys hate school.
This ALL resonates with me! My boys have been lucky to have wonderful teachers who understand boys. They understand that boys like to read and write about adventurous things. That the stories and pictures written about battles, and fighting, and defeating aliens, etc., are NOT a precursor to mindless violence, but a glimpse into the ways boys express themselves. Boys don’t like to write about their feelings. They don’t want to write “Why I like my name”, or “One day when I felt sad”. They want to write about things THEY can relate to. Also, boys should be allowed to read things that interest them, whether that be video game manuals, non-fiction, graphic novels/comic books, newspapers, magazines. Let them read what they want, and they will gain a love of reading. Also, many 5 year old boys are not developmentally ready, and have not grasped the pre-reading skills necessary to successfully learn to read in Kindergarten. 5 year old boys are notoriously wiggly by nature. Asking them to sit for long periods of time working on something that they may not be ready for is a recipe for disaster!
So glad this post resonated with you! I love hearing about teachers who “get it.” Your boys are fortunate.