Effective Tips For Raising Responsible Boys

Raising responsible boys is…not easy.

We live in a society that prioritizes personal pleasure and satisfaction over responsibility — and our kids are surrounded by people who fail to take responsibility for their actions. Add on top of that boys’ immature, still-developing brains and that time crunch many of us parents face trying to balance work and family, and it’s easy to see that there are no magical solution. It takes time to raise responsible children.

It ‘s estimated that 54% of parents wish they had more information about how to be a better parent. These 4 effective tips for raising responsible boys can help you parent with confidence: 

1. Reward them for responsible behavior

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via Flickr

Many parents are unsure whether children deserve rewards for completing chores, doing homework, and engaging in other things they are supposed to. However, it is best to realize that everyone likes to feel that their hard work is noticed and appreciated, including children. Your boys want to know that you recognize their efforts, especially when they do something they hate doing. Therefore, it is crucial to intentionally recognize their efforts and reward them for their positive behaviors. A simple high-five can go a long way to reward a child who has washed the dishes clean as expected. However, experts encourage providing more tangible rewards for responsible behavior. As such, you can offer points to earn prizes or provide an allowance for responsible behavior. You can also shop WatchBox to find a great luxury watch for a teen boy that demonstrates great responsibility. Rewards are worth giving out to show the child you recognize and appreciate their good behavior.

Furthermore, the incentive theory of motivation suggests that people are motivated to repeat behavior that leads to positive rewards. This demonstrates that rewards are ideal for making responsible behavior consistent and eventually turning them into habits.

2. Set the example

It is no secret that kids are very impressionable, whether in their early years or when transitioning into adolescence. Therefore, you have likely heard your child repeat something you’ve said or done something the same way you do. You can leverage your kids’ willingness to learn from you by setting positive examples they can follow. For example, if you wish to teach your children how to clean up after themselves, start cleaning up after yourself. This practice will encourage them to do the same sooner or later. 

It is important to remember that you should always model responsible conduct by your acts, irrespective of how big or small they are. For instance, always speak kindly to people to teach kids how to be responsible in their dealings with others. Also, buying cheaper ingredients to save a few dollars at the grocery store is a great way to teach them to be more responsible with money. Your children will also learn how to manage their time better if you are seldom late, so always be conscious of the examples you set.

3. Offer explanations

You have definitely heard the famous “…but, why?!” after telling your kids to do something. Your go-to answer is likely a variation of the standard “..because I said so” reply. However, this reply is rarely the end of the discussion, so you can easily lock horns in a never-ending back and forth with your kids. According to experts, the real trick to ending this back and forth is explicitly stating why you ask them to do a particular task. For instance, instead of telling your boys to clean their rooms because you said so, why not tell them to clean up because you have noticed they are more stressed and messy when their rooms are dirty? This simple explanation can help them understand why they need to execute tasks and may surprisingly reduce the frequency of conflicts.

4. Teach processes step-by-step

Photo by Gustavo Fring from Pexels

It is also essential to teach your children their tasks through detailed guides. You can’t tell them they are responsible for doing something every day without specifying exactly how you want them to do it. Indeed, you can always expect to have your expectations not met if you fail to give clear instructions, simply because your boys will have no idea what you expect. Therefore, break down chores into step-by-step processes that your kids can understand and easily follow. It might be beneficial to create checklists your kids can refer to for proper guidance when executing tasks. The steps you may teach may seem very simple or obvious to you, but it is not so straightforward for your kids, so devote time to teaching them for the best results.

Raising responsible boys takes time, but it well worth the effort!

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The Building Boys Bulletin

The Building Boys Bulletin Newsletter gives you the facts, encouragement, and inspiration you need to help boys thrive. Written by Jennifer L.W. Fink, mom of four sons and author of Building Boys: Raising Great Guys in a World That Misunderstands Males, Building Boys Bulletin includes:

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“I learned a lot about helping boys thrive over the past 20+ years — most of it the hard way! I’m eager to share what I’ve learned to make your path a little easier.”   – Jennifer

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